CANDID? Mermaids are known to get canned voluntarily or involuntarily. What Mermaids CAN Do and Should Not Do

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First, do not allow canning to happen.

Illustration by –

Mermaidens think themselves to be 0O0O smarter, than human females but will allow themselves to be crammed and canned for sake of being with a HU-man.

Photo credit – Henn Kim

Mer girlfriends don’t be canned.💦

Know that you can be a better catch in a net.

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©️2022 TheBubblyTipsyMermaid

The Journeys of Mer-Mating

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Originally posted On: The BubblyTipsy Mermaid (TIB)

Dear Human World,

You should know that mermaids are not as innocent as many people in the world might consider them to be.

The younger ones: Mer-maidens are seriously flawed. On their realm, mermaids have total dominance over their male population. The population of single, unmarried mer-maidens is astounding. The ratio between single and married mermaids is 3.5 out of 5.

Would it be hard to believe that many mer-maidens sneak on board ships and steal popular magazines? These young “fishettescherish “Glamour” magazines. Within a short time, and after a few reads, they are dreaming and imitating “females” of the human world. The outcome is a high maintenance attitude, French fashionista clonings, 3D shelled nail designs, fish-tail body waxings, exotic hairstyles and fragrances.

Many people may have never guessed why so many computers and tvs are seen floating on the ocean waters. then gone within moments.

Serendipitously, scuba divers have discovered many of these lost modern finds within ocean-floored shipwrecks. There can be only one explanation: Mer-maidens not only want “Glamour” magazines, but they also want a land-line, technological and human connects.

Many other shocking mer revelations can be elaborated on, however, in summary, I will only say: Everyday, millions of mer-maidens seek out every opportunity to be runover by any strong, fast-moving sea vessel. Their hope, is hospitalization followed up with surgery and the replacement of the lower torso with human legs (aka: an upside-down V Section).

Would you agree that mer-maidens do not want to be mermaids?

©2019 TheBubblyTipsyMermaid – all rights reserved

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The Straightforward Mermaid

A Poem

By Matthea Harvey

The straightforward mermaid starts every sentence with “Look…”

This comes from being raised in a sea full of hooks.

She wants to get points 1, 2, and 3 across, doesn’t want to disappear like a river into the ocean.

When she’s feeling despairing, she goes to eddies at the mouth of the river and tries to comb the water apart with her fingers.

The straightforward mermaid. has already said to five sailors, “Look, I don’t think this is going to work,” before sinking like a sullen stone.

She’s supposed to teach Rock Impersonation to the younger mermaids, but every beach field trip devolves into them trying to find shells to match their tail scales.

They really love braiding.

“Look,” says the straightforward mermaid. “Your high ponytails make you look like fountains, not rocks.”

Sometimes she feels like a third gender—preferring primary colors to pastels, the radio to singing.

At least she’s all mermaid: never gets tired of swimming, hates the thought of socks. source